Partners in Crime
by ThoseLittleNerdyThings
Summary: The TARDIS crash lands into 221B Baker Streets bathroom, with the Doctor and River on board. Little did they know that an alien has died in London, and both Sherlock's and the Doctor's knowledge is needed... To appear in the later chapters: Captain Jack Harkness. Jim Moriarty. The Master.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello! This is a story brought to you by ThoseLittleNerdyThings, who in fact, is actually two people. We have separate FanFiction account aside of this: WaterandWisom is me, and VoteSaxonForMinisterOfMagic is my counterpart ;) We hope you enjoy, as we had fun writing this!**

****Disclaimer – NO WE DON'T OWN ANYTHING! (although one can dream ;))****

Chapter One

The Doctor, in his 11th body, was quite able to move fast when needed; yet that is surprising since his 10th body was taller with longer legs. But however, the Doctor was now in an emergency, with the TARDIS (his Sexy) going out of control in the loudly coloured time vortex. He was literally flying, as in you could see air between his feet and the floor, over the controls, whilst also hanging on for dear life as the TARDIS hurtled down the tunnel of time at a more than violent speed.

As River slowly regained balance she pressed three green buttons, the TARDIS regained speed and stabilized herself. Embarrassed The Doctor fixed his bow tie and walked casually towards his wife.

"You learnt from the best," he said mockingly. The TARDIS landed unexpectedly and they fell on top of each other.

"But I can still fly her better than you can," River said, mischief evident in her eyes. She heaved herself off of the Doctor, all of her energy must have been knocked out of her in the fall. The Data Core at the centre of the TARDIS' console made a noise that meant that she had landed herself in a place adequately chosen by herself. This also happened to be a place where the Doctor was most needed, and generally that could be _anywhere_.

They left the TARDIS without checking if it was safe, and they walked right into the bathroom of a flat. The Doctor stuck his tongue out and tasted the air:  
"London, Baker Street." He remarked. A sudden girly, almost blood curdling, scream came from the shower. Slowly a naked man emerged from the shower, his black hair stuck to his face and his body covered in water droplets and goose bumps, and he didn't even have the innocence of a towel.

"What the hell-" he began.

"Ahhh, yes. River, meet the famous Sherlock Holmes, Sherlock Holmes this is Professor River Song," the Doctor introduced.

"Ohh I am going to be a Professor now? Spoilers, sweetie, spoilers." River joked. "Nice to meet you Mister Holmes." She said holding out her hand.

"This is before his 'death'. Don't bring it up." The Doctor whispered his warning to River.

Whilst all of this whispering and talking was going on, Sherlock had started to make some rather peculiar deductions about the pair: The woman, River, had a personality that may be even bigger than the volume of her hair, the Doctor, even though he didn't look like one, had a quirky way of holding himself, and shifted often, meaning that he wasn't sure or constantly nervous, most likely the latter. But, alas, the deduction-ing was put on hold as the strange pair had stopped muttering meaningless things to each other.

Soon later a small male came bounding into the room screaming on the top of his voice, "SHERLOCK ARE YOU OK?" The man handed a towel to Sherlock and questioned Sherlock on who these intruders were and why is there a Police Box in their bathroom

"It's OK, we're friendly," the Doctor chuckled to himself as he said it, it reminded it of Rory.

"Why are you in our flat?" The man seemed to have calmed down but still with a sense of warning in his voice.

"For the love of God, John. Put down the gun." Sherlock said, wrapping the towel around his lean, muscular body. As John put down the gun the Doctor looked sympathetically at John.

"What are you doing?!" Sherlock and John asked at the same time.

"We, my dear Watson and Holmes, are in your flat for a reason that we do not know of yet, but it must be quite a major reason, otherwise Sexy here (the Doctor pointed to the blue police box in the bathroom) wouldn't have brought us here."

"What is this, who are you, and what kind of a sick joke are you pulling on us?" John interrogated.

"We are the Doctor (the Doctor pointed to himself) and River (the Doctor pointed at River)."  
"Yes you had already explained that," said Sherlock through his teeth, "but as of yet you still have given John or myself a single reason WHY you are here. I don't want to know who brought you here, 'we are here because the blue box said so', I want to know why you are really here, and you had better give me a good damn reason or John here may shoot you."

"Sorry to disappoint, but we won't die if you shoot," said River, with an air as if she had said it a million times.

"We, I mean I, am a Time Lord. I have two hearts, I come from the planet Gallifrey and this is my wife. She is a child of the TARDIS," again The Doctor patted the side of the blue box. "This means she is part Time Lord and is the daughter of my best friends. Don't give me that look, John. It's a long story and I'd rather not go into it. I would like to talk about it, as I am alone in the universe, except my wife. But I can't even talk to her about it... Different time lines and what-not, gets a bit too wibbly-wobbly for my liking sometimes."

"So, when are we?" River asked, not paying attention to what her husband just said. But she did notice he's wearing a blue bow tie, meaning he is young now.

"We, dear River… actually I have no idea when we are. Dear John, when are we? The year?"  
"2012, just turned yesterday."  
"Oh oh oh. Bad bad bad. Bad year for so many different reasons, travelled in and out of this year a bit too much."  
"Right. I _still_ don't know who you are, but I'll accept you into my house. Sit," Sherlock gestured to a well-worn leather sofa, more like a loveseat actually. The Doctor took up the offer and plopped down, listening to the air whoosh out of the sofa as it bore his weight. River also then sat down, yet as described previously, it was a small sofa, and as River sat down, there was barely any room, so she might as well have sat _on_ the Doctor. John eyed them with disgust, maybe even a blush making a trail along his cheeks as he recalled past sittings with Sherlock on said sofa.

As John sat down, Sherlock placed his arm around him.

"It makes sense now." River whispered to the Doctor jokingly but the Doctor gave her a stern look in return.

"So, any weird murders, Sherlock?" Doctor inquired.

"Well, I shouldn't be telling you this, but as you're the only person who has ever evaporated into my bathroom, I will. There has been a _body _found in the Thames." Sherlock said handing him the notes. "Can you help us, Doctor?"

Looking at the photos of the body, the Doctor was rather shocked.

"This is a Jengain from the Lost Moon of Poshe. Looks like he crash landed here. They swore never to come to this planet again." The Doctor remarked calmly, much to John's disgust.

"May we see the body?"

**Sorry about the real crappy ending, but it's late and I'm tired. Please review as they are much appreciated! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Numero Dos of The Dead Jengain… We should update once or twice a week, and once or twice again at weekends. So you'll have lots of story to read! :D**

**Disclaimer: once again, we do not own this, sorry ._.**

After various comments about it being "bigger on the inside," the Doctor, with the help of River, managed to land the TARDIS in the basement of Scotland Yard. Just as they were about to leave, a voice came from the console.

"Doctor?" The voice sounded oddly familiar. The Doctor spun round in surprise, staring at the console, bewildered.

"Jack?! Jack Harkness?!"

"Why hello there Doctor, miss me?" said Jack, humour dripping from his voice.

"Urm, no not really, see I got married, so have friends now. Friends are cool," the Doctor stated.

"Who to?!" exclaimed Jack, who was now behind the Doctor.

"Where did you come from? Please don't tell me you are using the vortex manipulator _again_.."

River was now quite confused, as she owned the only vortex manipulator that was left, but then again, she did buy it fresh off of the wrist of a handsome _dead_ time agent..

"You have a new face," Jack quoted as he shook hands with his old friend. "And a new girl. Hello, Captain Jac-"

"Jack no." The Doctor said sternly. So Jack sulked and walked backwards towards the chair. As he sat down his behind was greeted but John Watson.

"What the-" He said spinning around, now standing. The Doctor gave a quick introduction before they left the TARDIS.

The TARDIS had stopped just where the body of the now lifeless Jengain had been left. Sherlock left the TARDIS just after River and the Doctor, and he was positively glad to be out of the police box, as it was literally impossible, and it made Sherlock's head spin.

"So, Sherly, do your deductiony-thingy-wingy so we can find out why this damned creature is here."

"He has had a limb taken off, maybe an arm. There are clear signs of struggle and something had shot it here. But it is hard too say what. No bullet, just a hole," he said, pointing a a large hole in the Jengain's leg.

"Doctor-" Jack started.

"NO! It can't be!" The Doctor exclaimed in fear. "Sherlock, can we take this body?"

"I'll talk to morgue, but it shouldn't be an issue." Sherlock went to the body with John and the Doctor, leaving Jack and River alone by the TARDIS.

"So, what's a fine girl like you doing around here?" Jack asked, trying his best at flirting with the beauty he was standing next to.

"I am travelling with the Doctor before I have to go back to Stormcage, but then he always comes back."

"Why does he always come back?" Jack asked again, stunned. The Doctor never goes back for his companions, _never_.

"Oh, I'm married to him, sweetie," River said, as if it were the most casual thing in the world.

"WELL..." Jack said

**Please R&R, and all that stuff! We love to hear what you think!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry about the wait guys, both of us have had science exams. But hey ho, enjoy and Review!**

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Jack was now mystified beyond belief, for a number of reasons: 1) The Doctor was MARRIED 2) How did the Doctor catch a girl like that?! And 3) THE DOCTOR WAS MARRIED. He couldn't be married, he always had had a romance with one of his 'companions' as he called the women that he enticed into his Police Box. But too be married? Surely not the Doctor.

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As River entered the blue box she saw Jack and the Doctor whispering in fear. What had they seen? What are they saying? One thing was for sure, that body was not Human. The Doctor waltzed up towards her, Jack looked disappointed as he slowly wrapped his arms around her and pecked her nose.

"That body isn't Human, is it, Doctor?" She asked inquisitively..

"You'll see soon. Jack, can we collect the body, Sherlock and John and head for Torchwood?"

"Sounds like a plan," Jack respond. After a bump, that sent the human, time lord, and child of the TARDIS flying across the control panels, John came in carrying the body, which was wrapped in a white blanket, assisted by Sherlock.

After about 5 minutes Sherlock suddenly stated, "I'm off to explore. Bored." in a huffing a breath and stalking off to explore and deduce the TARDIS.

"I-I-I'll be with Sherlock," stuttered John, unsure of what 'exploring' in Sherlock's mind would equate too.

"I must, must, must look at that body before Sherlock gets to it," thought the Doctor, as he knew what the Consulting Detective of 221B Baker Street may find, and may voice aloud. That is exactly what the Doctor didn't want, but for now he went off to talk to John.

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As John was trailing behind Sherlock in the inner heart of the TARDIS, he was actually mesmerised by the wonderful and beautiful, yet very alien structure of this peculiar ship. the TARDIS had tree-like beams filling the air all the way from just above head to the very top of her roof, which John couldn't actually see from his perspective. John tentatively places a hand on the wall, and found that the wall felt like dry coral. He could also feel a pulsing when he placed his fingertips on the wall. This must be the heart and soul of the TARDIS, thought John. He was just about to leave when John heard a massive whoop for joy coming somewhere from the end of the corridor.

"SHERLOCK! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Screamed John, whilst starting to run towards the noise. John had had a fair few incidents where Sherlock had run off and then started screaming with excitement of what he had discovered at the end of his chosen path.

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**Thank you for reading and the next chappie will be ups soon! Review please! (it won't hurt you, we don't bite ;))**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys you lucky people get 2 uploads in one day! Please don't forget to review on what you liked, thought we could improve or the next chapter(s) should contain. This was mostly written by VoteSaxonForMinisterOfMagic. Be sure to check me out! ;) **

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Meanwhile, at the TARDIS controls the Doctor was already examining the body that John and Sherlock had brought in. Whilst River was putting the stabilisers on the TARDIS and set co-ordinates for outside Torchwood, Jack joined the Doctor at the body. The sight of the being took his breath away – not in Jacks usual manner though.

"The Jengain." The Doctor stated grimly. "You see this stump," he said pointing to a lump of green skin about its second arm on his left side, "That's meant to be its arm. Poor thing." The creature only had three of the four arms left; its head was an oval shape and tilted to the right slightly; its huge black eyes had lost their previous shine; and its mouth, which seemed to be containing countless teeth the size of walnuts, was full of black liquid, most likely to be blood, the Doctor pointed out. "Poor thing." The Doctor repeated solemnly.

"You said it was from the Lost Moon of Poshe?" River asked, "What was he – or she – doing here?"

"He probably flew off course and came by accident… They are sworn enemy of Humans. But that is way into the future of this planet, then again it does get all timey wimey in the time zones of different galaxies." River was truly discombobulated at this thought.

* * *

Then suddenly as if on cue, a high pitch squeal came from one of the corridors. John came in to the silenced console, dragging a screaming Sherlock behind him. Sherlock's left hand seemed to be completely missing; however the girlish screams seemed to be more of a temper tantrum more than shock or pain.

"What happened?" River screamed as she ran towards Sherlock.

"He saw a bright light and put his hand inside it. I told him not to, but he never listens," John groaned but then gave a sidewards wink towards the injured consulting detective.

"Hold still!" River scolded at Sherlock, when Sherlock whimpered as she took his arm into his hands.

"River, don't you dare-" The Doctor started. Jack still continued to stare at the Jengain with upmost curiosity.

"Try and stop me," she smirked as a golden light shone from her hands. Simultaneously, Sherlock's hand grew back painlessly, John screamed, the Jengain sat up and Jack took out his gun and pointed at the creature. Everything happened at once. Sherlock nervously twitched his new hand whilst River explained what just happened to him;

"It's called regeneration. Only Time Lords can do it… I am semi-Time Lord, kind of a child of the TARDIS." She said to the silenced man. John and the Doctor had met Jack at the body and were trying and failing to restrain the surprisingly strong creature. In the blink of an eye, River turned round in midsentence and through a dart-looking-contraption at the greenest part of the Jengain's neck. As soon as it hit the surface of the slimy skin, the creature fell into a deep unconsciousness almost immediately. Now all eyes were on River, who have a shrug of the shoulders and before sulking off dramatically, kissed the Doctor on the lips. The Doctor quickly adjusted his bowtie nervously and ran to the console to hide his red face. He had kissed River many times before but something changed and he needs to find out what.

* * *

"Something is weird about this death, Jack. The Jengain would never be killed by a plane crash and they are the best fliers in the universe. They would never hit the moon unless…" The Doctor broke off in mid-sentence as he always does when River is not round for him to show off too.

"Look John, look! A new hand! It feels perfect! How don't we know about this on Earth?!" Sherlock shouted as his new hand traced John's cheek bones.

"Now, now Sherly. We don't want John here to get too excited." Jack winked. "But, you cannot tell anyone about anything that happens today, or however long we are with him. Ok? Sherlock, pay attention!" But Sherlock's hand fell onto John's back and they were engaged in a soft kiss. But Sherlock still managed to mumble a "Yes". As the men broke off, the Doctor was re-aligning the TARDIS landing co-ordinates.

"Jack, you are to go to Torchwood and get as much information as you can about the Jengain race. Here are the Unit's database passwords and the TARDIS'. If you lose them or use them as any type of trading, I will personally hold you responsible for any deaths that are caused by those actions. Twice." The Doctor said to Jack, handing him a small metal box with some sort of circular pattern on it. This of course was Gallifrain but as the TARDIS doesn't translate its home language, so only the Doctor understood what was inscribed on the mysterious looking box.

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River re-appeared in the left doorway as the TARDIS landed with an almighty BANG! Everybody was sent in different directions; John landed on Jack, who replied into Johns ear, "Hello there," in his low musky voice; Sherlock landed on the ripped, yellow chair and shot a dirty look towards Jack; The Doctor fell hard on the floor with a CRASH!; and River remained standing looking at her Vortex Manipulator, as if she had done this a million times before; and the Jengain fell to the floor with a plop.

Sherlock and John lifted the limp body back onto the table, which it once laid, whilst the Doctor took Jack to the door. "Remember what I said Jack. Don't lose it. Also, who's the Prime Minister at the moment?" The Doctor Inquired.

"Saxon. Harold Saxon."

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**DUH DUH DUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHH.**

**Thanks for reading :) 3**


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